How my running group taught me what fellowship should look like.

In early July I decided it was time to start running again. I used to be an avid runner when I lived in Kentucky. I had a friend who was also an athletic trainer and would run with me at obscene hours in the morning before we both had to go to work. Sometimes we would meet at 4 in the morning to run 10 miles together before we both had to be at work at 6. When I moved to Connecticut to be closer to family and friends I lost my running buddy. I still went for occasional runs but it’s harder to stay focused with out someone else who is depending on your mutual encouragement.

Then I got married and my husband and I faced a lot of major life things. We had our daughter, his mom was getting sicker and sicker, she died, we moved houses 3 times in a year and a half…

Anyway in July after too many years and being way out of shape I decided I wanted to get back into running. I knew it would be a very very slow process. After a couple weeks of running on my own I decided to meet up with a local running group one Saturday. I knew I would be running by myself because I was so slow but I was tired of running our very hilly neighborhood and was looking for some new safe routes.

The thing is that I actually didn’t run by myself, they wouldn’t let me.

I was only going to run 2 miles at a pace that these 3 other women could walk at, but they slowed way down and went with me for 2 miles before they headed out for a much longer and faster run together.

Dripping from sweat after a group run.

I was so grateful for their encouragement and company while they helped me finish something that was hard for me but super easy for them. And it cost them, it cost them time and energy and maybe a little frustration about the pace to stay with me. They never let on that they were in any way frustrated with the sacrifice.

Every Saturday that I’ve been in town this summer I’ve run with them. Every Saturday my speed has improved. Every Saturday I haven’t run alone, at least for a major portion of the run.

Yesterday was the first time we weren’t on a trail where I could run half of my mileage and then turn back while they continued on for significantly higher miles.

Yesterday we ran the course of a local upcoming 5k. The thing is I am super good at getting lost. I am even super good at being confident in my wrong directions, so much that I’ve been known to get others who know the way lost. Quite frankly my sense of direction is something friends and family joke about often and may have rightly frustrated my husband a time or two.

As the leader of the group was describing the course yesterday I must have looked worried. I voiced my nervousness about not getting back to my car.

I don’t know why I was worried, my previous experience was that this group takes care of each other, they run together.

A women who has been always a little faster than I can keep up with, always a little bit ahead of me on the trail slowed down to run with me through every turn of the course. She and some others where going to go on for another 7 miles. She stayed with me until the very last turn where I would just have to stay on the same road for 3/10 of a mile to get to my car. She helped me push my pace to run the fastest I have so far, and those she was running on with stopped to wait for her as she got me on my way to the finish line.

I must have apologized 75 times for slowing her down because at one point she said, “this is what our group does, we stay with each other and encourage each other. No one comes to a group run because they want to run alone.”

As I ran the last 3/10 of a mile to my car I couldn’t stop thinking that maybe a lot of Christians could learn something about being Christ like from my running group.

As I approached the parking lot I noticed that two people who had been significantly farther ahead of me where waiting for me to finish, to make sure I hadn’t accidentally turned somewhere and gotten lost, to ensure I finished the race course.

All throughout the New Testament we are given examples of older (older meaning more experienced not necessarily older in age) Christians coming along side those who might not be as skilled or experienced in their walk with Christ.

The entire chapter of Titus 2 asks older men and women in the faith to take on the very important task of teaching the younger Christians.

In Christian circles we call this process of older Christians teaching the younger Christians discipleship.

Discipleship is kind of like my running group, spending time to slow down and help people who aren’t as fast as you. Discipleship takes time and effort, it’s a sacrifice.

I’ve been on both the receiving end and the giving end of discipleship.

Discipleship, the act of repeatedly slowing down to run along side a slower brother or sister in Christ is closely linked with fellowship.

Hebrews 10:24-25 says “and let us consider how to stir one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the day drawing near.”

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12, often read at weddings, also talks about the importance of Christian fellowship

It says “two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. If either of them falls down one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls down and has no one to help them up. Also if two lie down together they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three is not easily broken.”

I think sometimes as Christians we get so busy with life that we neglect both of these things. We have work and family and kids extracurricular stuff and volunteer obligations at church and all the activities.

It’s super easy to loose sight of the very important things because of all the business.

In churches in America we have so many programs we often loose sight of the personal responsibility to make discipleship and fellowship a priority. We rely on church programs to do the job for us.

We have small groups for adults, Sunday school for kids, youth group for teens… we think “well if so and so wanted to be in community they would come to all the things.”

Unfortunately over the last 10 months my husband and I experienced the perfect storm of lack of fellowship and discipleship due to circumstances beyond our control.

Walking through this very frustrating and stressful situation has really opened my eyes. I realized that it doesn’t cost me that much to reach out to another person or couple and invite them into fellowship. I realized that often there is more going on than what we can see on the surface, maybe there are circumstances beyond their control that are preventing them from participating in the church activities designed to provide fellowship and discipleship without much effort.

“I don’t know what to wear…”

I went for a run this morning at approximately the same time I’ve been going for a month or so.  The air was crisp and I got to see the sunrise.

My heart and my mind immediately lept to fall and fall leaves, sweaters, scarves, apple picking, and mini sessions…

I love fall photo sessions for so many reasons.

The natural backdrop of colors is stunning

The temperature is generally not to hot or cold, perfect for layering up but also being outside for a while.

I have recently had a few conversations about fall photo sessions and getting them scheduled.

But once you have them on the calendar, I find that many clients start stressing about how they are going to dress their family.

Are they going to all match exactly?

How do you coordinate without matching exactly?

How do I achieve an overall look that I will cherish 10 years from now?

Here are a few helpful tips with some pinsperation

Coordinate, don’t match…

What does that even mean?  DO NOT DRESS EVERYONE IN MATCHING WHITE SHIRTS AND BLUE JEANS ALA 1995.  Oh wait that was only my extended family?

Here are is an example of coordinating outfits

And now if you’re anything like me, you are thinking “well where can I go to actually try on clothes and come up with coordinating outfits…”

My go to suggesting is Old Navy.  I’m not in anyway connected to the company but the reality is that you can literally come up with outfits for the entire family in one store and that is a big deal

Embrace all the layers

To me fall screams “scarves, sweaters, all the cozy warm things.”  We have a saying here in New England where I live “don’t like the weather?  Wait 5 minutes, it will change.”  Adding a sweater, a scarf, a cute hat will not only enable you to add or remove layers should the weather dictate that, it also easily allows for multiple looks without a complete wardrobe change.  Here are some examples where a few layers and accessories can easily be swapped in and out.

Comfortable is best, especially when kids are involved

When my daughter was an infant and toddler, basically before she had the ability to voice her own opinion, I used to choose outfits and clothing for her based solely on how they looked.  Well now she is older and she has strong opinions, her main goal when getting dressed is that she is comfortable.  Quite frankly I don’t blame her.  The last thing you want when you are trying to get beautiful pictures for this years Christmas card is for your kids to be fidgeting and looking like they just simply are not having a good time and are about ready to rip off the scratchy collar or ditch the too tight boots.  If you are investing in the photographer and the time and the new clothes, you want the perfect images.  Making sure your kids, spouse and yourself are wearing something they feel comfortable and look cute in will provide confidence that will shine through into the images.

 

Don’t forget the details

Joey and Suzie need haircuts?  Your 3 week old manicure is chipping off?  Sure your photographer might be a wiz at using photoshop, but there are just somethings that can’t be fixed.  Make the appointments and get the haircuts before your have the photos taken.

 

I hope you are encouraged and inspired.  If you are looking for someone to walk you through all the steps to updating your family photos this fall, I’d love to help you.

You can find me at my facebook page

 

Confessions of a first time soccer mom…

When I signed our girl up for soccer there was probably still snow on the ground, it was definitely not warm out.

I said “hey you are going to play soccer this spring, it’s going to be so much fun.”

She said “but mom I don’t have an outfit for that…”

No worries I thought, we’ll pick up some shin guards and a new ball.  She already has sneakers and athletic shorts.  It’s going to be perfect.

I envisioned myself sitting on the sidelines laughing as she ran around participating with a coach who knew EXACTLY what they were doing and had be doing it for 20 years…  Basically I envisioned the coaches of my youth soccer days coaching her while I sat on the sidelines socializing with other parents.

About two weeks before the start of the spring season I got the dreaded and apparently very common email “we have no one to coach your kid’s team, if no one volunteers we will cancel…”

I thought to myself “how hard can it be?”  and “I have 15 years experience working in Division 1 college athletics,” and “I played soccer all of my childhood and through high school, I can do this…”

Guys the very first practice I tried to explain a fun game, I said “ok go” and half of the kids took off running for the playground three fields away.  All the parents were laughing as a few of them ran off to retrieve the kids.  I hadn’t even noticed, I was busy trying to play the game with the kids that had stayed behind.

To be honest coaching her little team has been fun, and I’ve had to laugh at myself a lot.

I’ve gotten pointers from my almost 4 year old.  Two weeks before the end of the spring season she said we weren’t cheering enough and we needed to put our hands in and do a cheer.  I honestly have no idea where she came up with that. We had never done it at practice. Apparently she was correct because all her fellow 3-5 year old friends liked the idea also.

Now that I’ve completed my first experience coaching 3-5 year olds, here are my tips

1. DO NOT go to YouTube and type in “soccer drills for 4 year olds.”  Somewhere out there in the world there are 4 year olds that can do agility ladders,  then there are the rest who definitely should not attempt agility ladders.
2. water breaks are mostly for the coach to take deep breaths and figure out what to do next, it really is okay to give them every 2-3 minutes
3. It’s much easier to take games and songs they already know and incorporate soccer into them. “We’re going on a bear hunt” worked super well to incorporate change of direction and hopping gross motor skills. Red light/ green light was also a success.
4. If you are going to play a game with a boundary, walk the boundary with them before you start.
5. It’s always good to have a “wacky outfit day”. We planned it for the last day and it was a TOTAL blast. One kid in a Batman outfit refused to answer to anything but Batman. Also my own daughter who had spent the previous 2 practices mostly taking extended water breaks and eating snacks was fully participational in her tutu.
6. The size 3 ball is WAY TO HEAVY for them and it tires them out super fast, make sure to sprinkle non ball related games and activities throughout the practice.
7. It’s best to just use name tags every week.
8. It’s completely helpful to make the parents come out to do passing drills.
9. If a drill or game is not working out how you envisioned it, it’s completely ok to ditch that plan before all the kids try it and move to something you know they can do. This isn’t high school or college soccer. Ahem, agility ladders.

10. If you are having fun the kids will too and at this age, that’s the most important thing.

We haven’t fully decided if we plan on continuing soccer in the future, but I learned a lot and my daughter definitely gained some athletic skills.

Carry in, carry out

We spent this week at a hot sunny beach. It was restful and fun.

We enjoyed sunrises over the water.

 

And lots of sensory play time

Since we flew to our destination, we didn’t bring any sand toys. We bought one shovel and bucket at the dollar store shortly after arriving.

I am an absolute lover of long morning walks on the beach.

I grew up living on a beach. We take day trips to beaches in New England all summer long…but this was the first time we’d gone to the beach as a vacation in a few years.

I don’t know if I never noticed before because I didn’t have kids, or if it’s just a thing at the beach we were visiting, but thanks to my morning walks, by the second to last day we had a whole plethora of beach toys.

Our daughter was especially excited about the pink kick board that has Disney Princess on the other side. She won’t stop calling it a “skate board” after watching some surfers this week.

Every single item in that assortment except the blue bucket and orange shovel were collected on my morning walks.  They were washed up on the beach by the waves.

I figured “we’ve lost most of our sand toys and I don’t want to add all this plastic to our trash” so I’ll bring them home. We plan to spend a lot of time at the beach near our home this summer.  As I thought about our lost selection of sand toys, I wondered where they had gone.  Had they washed up on some other beach somewhere after we left them accidentally?  Had they been re-homed and used by another kid like these ones?   Had they been collected for trash?  Where they still floating out there in the ocean somewhere?

I felt proud of my resourceful and environmentally friendly idea of collecting the pretty much new toys and reusing them.

Then the last night of our trip it was stormy, heavy winds and high seas.

In the morning we watched the sunrise from our balcony again.

I went for my walk. There was a plethora sea weed. Nestled in the sea weed I found quite a few washed up Portuguese man of war

 

And I collected a ridiculous amount of sand toys.  I was disheartened to be honest.  There had to be a limit on how many of these we could realistically fit into our suitcases and bring home.  I moved them further up the beach, away from the waves, hoping some other mom out for a morning walk would rescue them for her kids to play with.

I didn’t find much “trash” like old water bottles or drinking straws.  I honestly felt surprised given the pictures I’ve seen of beaches littered in straws and bottles and all sorts of other trash.

I feel like we are inundated with constant requests to reduce waste, and I don’t think it’s a bad thing.  I think I hear it so much it has kind of become filtered out background noise.

Don’t use straws.  Don’t use plastic bags.  Switch to reusable feminine hygiene products…

Those are all good things to do.  And I truly want to leave for my daughter and generations to come, a clean and safe environment, but sometimes I get a bit lackadaisical about it.  Let’s face it, individually portioned cheese sticks are so much less of a hassle.  Yogurt pouches are way less messy.

We clothed diapered, and that was a huge wasted reduction.  It wasn’t as much work or as bad as people tried to convince us it would be.  But it was a big decision, made partly because it would save us thousands of dollars.

But here I am realizing that cleaning up this beautiful earth from human consumption isn’t only in the big decisions, like cloth diapering.   It’s in the small daily choices, to choose to make the extra stop to drop off grocery bags at a store to recycle, to take one more minute at the beach to make sure we collected all our sand toys and carry them all out even though our hands are full.

So here I am making a renewed commitment to do my part this summer.  We will put up the laundry line we’ve been meaning to put up and use it every day we can.   And we will take less toys to the beach and make sure to bring them all home.  

 

I want for my daughter and generations to come an opportunity to enjoy the beautiful world God gave us, to experience His creativity and power as can only be experienced in His Creation.

It’s time to schedule in camp time

I’ve been thinking about Rumney Bible Conference lately. Memorial Day is right around the corner. Summer is coming faster than we know it. The summer program is available on the website, there are concerts, speakers, volunteer weekends all on the schedule.

The other day my friend told me about a really cool old abandoned camp near her house. “I know you like being outside and it has really cool ruins” she said.

I decided to check it out.

She was right, there was a beautiful view of a small lake, some remnants of an old camp. There was no one around and it was still and serene.

It left me with a sadness and a lot of questions.

Gone were the old cabins with the names of generations of campers. Gone were the craft shack, the archery range, the docks and benches and life jacket stands.

There were only a few remnants left to tell the story.

I thought about the counselors who had spent their summers in the very spot I was standing, working harder than they’d ever worked in their lives, pouring their hearts into the lives of young people, hoping and praying that they were making a difference.

I wonder if they come back to visit? Do they sit on a favorite rock and smile at the memories? Do they laugh about the time Cameron dressed up as a leper during Bible Characters dinner and scared a few children?
Do they remember the time a camper was dropped off and on the medical form it said “sleep runner, good luck” as in this kid will run through the woods at lightening speed in the middle of the night? I needed a little more than luck that week, more like a lot of prayers, a lot of fellow counselors chasing through the woods and a 48 hour nap at the end of the week.
Do they think about all the speakers during teen camp whose words and insight greatly influenced their life even today?
Do they start singing the closing campfire song?
Do they still have staff reunions?

Do they tear up at what the camp has become when they tell their children about the summers they spent there, wishing they could take them back for similar experiences?

This year we moved a little farther out from the city. We’re still connected to all the activities and stores and “connectedness” of living in an urban area by a short drive on interstate. We’ve learned that our daughter is afraid of ants, that we love the peace and quiet and the sound of the brook running in our backyard when our windows are open. We still, like many people, struggle to find the balance between planned activities and family time. We still find ourselves wanting to disconnect from the technology in an ever increasingly “connected” world so we can actually connect with the people around us and more importantly quiet our souls to connect with God.
We find that the days our daughter doesn’t get outside to ride her bike, throw rocks, or jump off our stump she has a harder time sitting at the dinner table to eat or going to bed. When she’s outside playing she will sometimes stop and reflect at the beauty around us, she’s even taken to pointing out the things God has made, like the sky, the stars, the trees.
She needs the outdoors, even the people at Harvard say so.
we need to be connected to people without a screen between us, we need camp time.

We’re halfway through April so here I am scheduling a long weekend up at camp. Looking forward to remembering old memories, making new ones, and singing all the songs around a campfire. I know I’m just one person, but I also know that if places like Rumney Bible Conference had all the one persons to take advantage of these special places we would all be contributing to helping these places remain available for the next generation. Would you like to join us?

A quick and easy Easter craft

When we first bought our house and moved in I loved the ease of having a double front door.

Then I realized I would need 2 wreaths…

I’d been looking for some Easter wreaths and some been looking for some Easter crafts to do with my preschooler that would prompt us to talk about the reason we celebrate.

While we were out in the yard the other day enjoying the warmer weather, I was inspired by our HUGE brush pile. I rounded up supplies that we already had and spent zero dollars.

First we collected some branches and broke them into appropriate sizes.

Next we got out some paint so the preschooler could paint them.

We left them outside to dry, then it rained on them so we left them a little longer.

Next we grouped them into bundles and wrapped them with craft wire I found in my supplies.

I asked why we were hanging crosses on the doors for Easter and she told me it’s because Jesus died on the cross for us and that is what we celebrate.

I’m pretty happy with both the finished product and the process to make them. If you are looking for a cheap, easy, focused Easter craft, maybe you can collect some sticks in your yard.

Museum Memberships

We LOVE our Connecticut Science Center membership.

When my parents asked us what we wanted for Christmas, it was top of the list. They’ve gotten it for my brother and his family for years and we’d heard from friends that it was a great place.

A few years ago my parents had gotten a membership to another local museum that seemed like it was more suited to our young daughter. We ended up using it several times but most times we went the small museum was filled with school field trips, making it crowded and frustrating for our then 2 year old who kept getting run over. On multiple occasions we left after not even staying a half an hour.

We had talked about going to the Science Center several times last year but had kind of balked at the price for general admission.

When we got the message saying my parents had gifted us a membership, we used it the first day we could and have gone several times since.

I’ve been asked by multiple friends if I think the membership is worth the money, and honestly the answer is a resounding yes.

We’ve been there 4 times since we got the membership, twice as a family and twice with friends.

The general admission price for us to go 1 time is $64.85. If you are keeping track, we would have spent $211.56 on admission with the number of trips we’ve taken so far.

Additionally we’ve taken advantage of the reciprocal admissions occasionally offered through our membership. In January we went to Norwalk Aquarium, which was free admission with our membership. We would have paid $42.90 if we’d been charged admission for our visit.

This month we will be taking advantage of the free admission to Mystic Aquarium. Total cost for that visit would be $103.97 without the reciprocal free admission.

If you are keeping track so far, we would have spent $348.53 from January till now with the visits to the Science Center and the reciprocal Aquariums.

THREE HUNDRED FORTY EIGHT DOLLARS AND FIFTY THREE CENTS.

And how much did our membership cost? $160 and it’s tax deductible, gives us flat rate parking…. I could go on.

The thing that has been the greatest benefit is that it’s so easy to say yes. You want to go there this weekend? Yes. You want to go with friends next week? Sure. We don’t find ourselves calculating our budget for the next week and wondering if we should shell out $64.85 or more for the visit. It’s cold and gross out? We need an indoor place to run off energy? I’d much rather go to a place that has fun activities and is educational than take another trip to the mall to mindlessly window shop indirectly communicating to my young impressionable daughter that excessive consumption in our consumer driven culture is all there is.

So here’s the thing, a membership to the Connecticut Science Center might not be for you, maybe it’s just not your type of place, or it’s super crowded at the times you would go, kind of like that other museum was for us. Maybe there is another museum that is a better fit for your family.

One Christian’s view on conflict and abuse

My Bible study has been looking at the life of King David for many weeks now. He was a man after God’s own heart, he was a leader of God’s people, he wrote the book of psalms… and at times he made questionable life choices.

We all know about the story of David and Bathsheba. If you aren’t familiar, basically David had an affair with another man’s wife, got her pregnant, then had the woman’s husband killed. It’s in 2 Samuel 11.

Anyway that isn’t the story that has had me really thinking the last few weeks. The story of David’s children, a daughter Tamar and 2 sons Amnon and Absolom as well as David’s response to their conflict has caused me to pause and process how I view conflict, how I view aggressors, how I should be taking action when someone is abusive towards another.

I was not as familiar with the story of Amnon, Absolom, and Tamar so I’ll provide another brief synopsis just in case you aren’t either. Amnon was obsessed with his beautiful sister Tamar. He devised a deceptive scheme to get alone with her and proceeded to rape her. So absolutely gross, I know. Anyway their dad King David found out and was angry, but in one of his more questionable life choices he unfortunately did not act to defend his daughter and punish his rapist son. Enter Absolom, King David’s other son and Amnon’s half brother… Absolom took matters into his own hands and killed his brother for raping his sister. Ultimately this caused a division between David and his son Absolom. You can read more about it in 2 Samuel 13-16 but I’ll stop there.

So here’s what got me thinking, I hate conflict. I hate conflict so much that sometimes I avoid addressing the conflict directly for so long that it creates other unnecessary further conflict which ultimately leads to an even larger conflict than the original one. I’m going to guess I’m not the only on who has ever had this happen.

Had David addresses the initial conflict between his children, he wouldn’t have found himself fleeing Jerusalem with his son Absolom trying to usurp his authority as king.

Please note that I am not calling Amnon raping his sister a minor conflict, I’m simply saying that David’s lack of action in dealing with that abuse led to further avoidable conflict.

This story has had me thinking about what I do when I see a person abusing another, do I step in and defend? Or do I avoid the situation in attempt to not deal with the conflict? And how does my lack of action affect the victim?

Sometime I think we as Christians can get very confused about how to handle these situations. We know God is loving and kind, we want to be peacemakers. Instead of addressing the conflict or abuse we try to manipulate a way out of it.

We think “well these two people who are my friends don’t like each other so I’ll only hangout with them separately and hope it doesn’t backfire” but then you find yourself standing there having bumped into the one while hanging out with the other and it’s SUPER awkward… and no that isn’t hypothetical, it’s happened to me in the last year.

Or maybe you see one kid bullying another at the bus stop everyday while waiting with your kid and you make excuses for the bully… they have medical issues, they have a hard home life, they (fill in the blank) and so instead of standing in to protect and defend the kid that’s leaving with bruises on their body from being bullied, you make excuses to avoid addressing the actual abuse you are watching with your own eyes…

Or maybe someone you know is making racist comments and you just ignore it. You know that every single human being is created in God’s image and the Bible is very clear that racism is unacceptable, but you don’t want to deal with the conflict so you don’t.

All of this brings me back to the story of David and his 3 children. In Matthew 7:12 Jesus says “So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them…”. We know it as the golden rule.

I think to myself:

If I was Tamar, would I want my Dad to defend me and punish my brother who raped me? Yes

If I was your friend and your other friend was mad at me for no apparent reason, would I want you to say to your friend “what has my friend done exactly to make you treat her this way? She is your sister in Christ, start treating her like one?” Yes, yes I would

And if my kid was being bullied by another kid would I want the adult present to step in and protect my kid, to share with those in authority about the abuse they saw happening? Yes to that also

If someone was judging me because of my race, again I would want my friend to stand up and say “there is no room in my life for people who judge other based on race”.

Am I dealing with conflict and abuse the way Jesus asks me to deal it?

Or am I following David’s poor example in 2 Samuel 13?

No mom judging here…

Today hasn’t been my best day ever.

Firstly, while coming home from bible study I slipped and whipped out on the last remaining sliver of ice on our driveway. I was completely fine, completely soaked, and looking around hoping none of my neighbors saw.

I brushed myself off and went about my business. It hasn’t been determined yet if any neighbors happened to be looking out the window.

Anyway fast forward to mid afternoon… I decided we needed hot chocolate, so I filled up my trusty tea kettle and turned on the stove. I walked away for a minute, or several. My lovely kettle has this one annoying thing, it doesn’t make any noise when it boils.

When I came back it was completely out of water.

So having a momentary mental lapse I went the sink to refill….

And then I steam burned my own hand. So definitely not my best day.

Thankfully my big deal brother is a deputy fire chief or whatever and I’ve now been soaking in cold water for over an hour and a half with no sign of blistering.

It’s always good to have the right kind of specialized people in these situations to tell you exactly how to handle it.

Here’s the thing also.

While I’ve been soaking my hand, the 3 year old has been…

Because I still have to mom.

I know there are a small number of people who either have the finances, or massively special support system the includes people who don’t work, don’t have kids, and live close enough to drop everything at a moments notice so they don’t have to mom when they are sick, tired, soaking their hand, or just don’t feel like it and need a day off… I’m happy for you all really I am.

Then there are mostly rest of us who are just trying to get to bed time today with everyone physically, emotionally, and spiritually ok. I’m with you mostly rest of us moms, we are literally doing the very best we can. And God sees us too, and I know He is with us.

Today my single mom friend posted that her childcare for today got sick and she had to take her less than 1 year old to work.

Today my friend has one kid in the hospital, one kid’s birthday this weekend, and she is sick.

Today my friend had to make a gut wrenching decision to put one of her kids back into institutional care because they can’t provide the care level required at home.

If I had a billion dollars I would hire them all a full time nanny and house keeper.

I don’t so today I just want to say I see you friends, I see you doing the best you can for all of your kids and I know it’s hard, and I’m not going to mom judge you for doing your absolute best when your tank is empty

Snow days are coming

We finally have somewhat significant snow in the forecast here in the northeast. My friends in other parts of the country are posting their snow pictures and my girl keeps asking when we are going to be able to sled down our hill again.

I was at the gas station yesterday and people were filling their gas cans to have on hand for snow blowing.

Being prepared is important but sometimes I wonder about the mad rush to buy certain things.

My first year living in Kentucky there were a few inches of snow predicted. I remember my boss telling me to run out an buy bread and milk, I was like “I don’t eat them anyway.” When I went to the store on the way home there was not a single loaf of bread, dozen eggs, or gallon of milk. I thought to myself “do these people sit around eating French toast the entire time?”

Since having a kid my preparation for snow days has changed a little. Do I have enough activities to keep her occupied without leaving the house for several days? Do I have enough to keep her busy enough that she won’t paint walls the minute I turn around for a second?
There are somethings I love about the forced family togetherness and slowing down, but too many days in a row can start to wear on all of us

Here are my top 10:

1. A sled and appropriate snow gear
I think this is the exact one we have

but I saw this on amazon and had to stop myself recently. You can click on the picture and buy it for us if you really want

Even when we didn’t have a glorious hill in our yard like we do know, we have a lot of fun playing in the snow on our sled.

2. Grillable food.
I don’t know how in the world one cooks French toast when the powers out, but our gas grill is always ready to go. Stock up on the meat and veggies people. If the power goes out, it’s cold out anyway, move the perishables outside.

3. Ingredients for snow cream
it pretty simple, milk, sugar, a little bit of vanilla extract…
basically equal parts milk and sugar, then just keep dumping in snow and stirring till its the consistency of ice cream. We have been known to use chocolate milk instead of regular milk and then we omit the sugar
My husband always has to remind me to let it snow a little longer to avoid the “toxic New York City Acid Snow”

4. Art supplies
maybe it’s just my kid, but she’s never met an art pwoject she hasn’t loved. I always try to have the supplies for a couple new and unique projects on hand. Or we just resort to coloring and painting. Also last year I bought her a giant box of generic paints and I must say they were subpar so now I just stick to the

5. Bath bombs
generally on snow days, after we do all the paint, we head straight for a nice long bath because lets be real, it can entertain for quite a long time. I envision this morphing into a bit of a spa day when she gets older, especially after we spent a single solitary night with my friend Tracy “I wear flipflops all winter because I claim my feet are warmer”
. My girl has legit been asking for me to “paint cute toenails” ever since we got back a week ago.

6. Toilet paper
There’s the obvious “it would really stink to run out”
also there are towers that can be built and then knocked over with that $3 kick ball thing you bought at Walmart last summer and haven’t used since

7. Balloons
There are about a million games you can come up with using balloons, and if your brain is completely beyond thinking one up, there are about a million on pintrest so you don’t actually have to think

8. Fire wood
We actually just got some today because a. power out means heat out, and b. it’s just quite a nice calm ambiance to sit by the fire while the snow comes down

9. New Library books
there is nothing worse than being stuck at home for days having to read the same books you’ve read your kid 7 BILLION TIMES because you own them. Plus also if the power/ internet are out, well then your all out of luck with the watching DVDs and streaming PBS kids, sorry. We are heavy library users anyway, but when I know there is a big storm in the forecast I try to schedule an extra library visit into the lead up

10. New DVDs from the library
because cross your fingers we hope not to loose power and a big major snow storm is not the time to take away screen time as a disciplinary action, for mom’s sanity.